Arses: DWP, Haemorrhoids, and DA

A typical scrounger

Oh dear, oh dear! For the 23rd year in a row the National Audit Office have qualified the accounts of the DWP because of the “material level of fraud and error in expenditure on state benefits,” while fraud and error, the NAO also tell us, have “constantly remained at a high level.”

This is another huge blow to the extremists who continually champion the DWP’s fraud statistics but who can now add the National Audit Office to the long list of those recognising the department’s figures as being discredited. It looks very much as if the DWP have simply pulled these numbers out of their bottom.


Speaking of backsides, I remember a joke from my schooldays where someone would ask if you’d like a lot of money. When you replied, “Yes,” they’d respond, “Feel my arse then, I’ve got piles!”

Thanks to the DWP your haemorrhoids can now be a profitable source of income, earning you a slice of the ESA booty. Incredibly, £2m in handouts was last year given to those incapable of work due to piles hurting their bottoms. Throw in £13m for headaches, £45m for “fatigue” and £218.5m for our old favourites; pissheads and smackheads, and you’ll see it’s the public purse that’s being bled to death by these bottom feeders.

According to the Anusol site, changes in lifestyle can keep piles at bay. These include regular exercise. In other words, get off your fat arses and get a job!

Welfare extremists often use the subject of tax avoidance to deflect attention away from the huge levels of IB/ESA/DLA fraud and are positively salivating at the prospect of Disability Alliance possibly issuing a legal challenge to the Government’s welfare reform plans. This would be the same Disability Alliance who, according to their 2006-2007 annual report (the most recent I can find online), receive funding from Lloyds TSB, a target of UKuncut. To avoid any accusations of hypocrisy perhaps those continually raging against tax avoidance should be suggesting DA cut their ties with Lloyds and Unum Provident-the bogeyman of the extremists. I bet they don’t though! Money before morals…

Over to you hypocritical extremists……

 Disability Alliance

 Universal House

 88-94 Wentworth Street

 London, E1 7SA (Page 3)


Next time a charidee asks you for money you might want to ask them if they’re a member of Disability Alliance and whether this involves any financial contributions. Remember, DA might be legally challenging the Government’s welfare reform plans, those same plans that aim to save the taxpayer billions while, at the same time, ensuring the genuinely needy receive the benefits they’re entitled to. Think about this before handing over your hard-earned. 

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