The Welfies Part 3



Be it from bombing ISIS in Syria to working tax credits their isn’t a topic OSG can’t shoehorn the spare room subsidy into. Countless hours are spent hammering away on his keyboard, reciting his whole life story, his wife’s life story, how the Tories are responsible for his failure in life and usually ending in some trite quotation from a fellow Leftie.

Has anyone ever seen the tat he turns out advertised anywhere?

Quite simply there is no employer that would take on such an individual whose output can at best be described as minimal.

Universal Credit will be his undoing but in the meantime it’s congratulations to OSG, least employable Scrounger of the Year.

It’s the competition for the scrounger least likely to ever gain full-time employment.

OLD SCROUNGING GUY is in the lead at the moment.

Keep voting. Closing date 3/7/14

The candidates are….

OLD HIPPY GUY: A man who hasn’t done a honest day’s work for years. In the words of one forum poster he “Makes shite that nobody wants to buy.” He uses his hobby as a way to claim generous benefits that Universal Credit will put a stop to. He once claimed his “business” was just about to get off the ground when the Tories came to power and they yet again scuppered his chances of becoming a millionaire.

GibsonSG: Apparently incapacitated in an accident he spends most of his time moaning about the DWP and is famous for once asking other FM’s if they had a shotgun he could borrow to shoot himself. He really is the one of the most depressing people on any forum, anywhere.

CELT1987: Imagine a computer screen covered in spittle, the stench of entitlement and saliva dribbling down a chin. Yes, it’s our next contender who seems somewhat bemused that he can’t find employment. It’s of  little surprise to me that that he’s unemployable and will soon be having his handouts cut. His anger management problems exclude him from the workplace and he’ll no doubt  find himself banned on DS.

Vote now!

Attention ESA/DLA scroungers!

£12bn of welfare cuts to come. Go get ’em Iain!

I’ve been swamped with emails since the election defeat of the scroungers and will reply as quickly as I can.  There area lot of bitter parasites out there judging by inbox.

I’d like to think only IDS is hated more than me by the sickness benefit mafia.

The Welfies Part 2

Who’s your favourite scrounger?


It’s time for one of our most cherished awards and one in which again there’s been fierce competition and golden moments of comedy.

The first nominee is OLD HIPPY GUY who’s spent the last two years on DS blubbering over the spare room subsidy. There’s not a topic he can’t shoehorn the subsidy into and his wallowing in self-pity over his shitty life is an example to cry-babies everywhere.

Next, CELT1987. “I’ve got Cerebal Palsy” Yes, you’re also a self-pitying moron  who dribbles entitlement all over the forum.  His symptoms include random, uncontrolled posts and lack of intellectual balance.

GibsonSG was originally a shoe-in for this award after his wailings over the DWP losing his scrounge form and subsequent request for a shotgun so he could put himself out of our misery.

However, one person has stood head and shoulders above other welfare lovers this past year and that man is……..Fletch/Windwalker!!!

A strong showing over the past few months has catapulted Fletch/Windwalker to his second Welfie of 2015. After his DS ban for anti-semitic posts DS Fletch railed against the mods, wailed about unfairness and unsuccessfully tried to have his oponents banned. Fast forward a few months later and you’ll probably never see a sadder forum site than Fletch/Windwalker on his knees, begging admin to ban a poster who was destroying him every day on Bitchfest. After a brief return of only a post or two a tearful Fletch shuffled off into the internet wilderness.


More awards….coming soon

Can Fletch make it a hat-trick? If so he could give one Welfie to each of the daughters he’s recently discovered.

The Welfies


I’ve been away visiting a mythical daughter but now I’m back and it’s time to reveal the winner of the  Walter Mitty category.

This is always one of the most hard fought and coveted awards in the scrounging world. Previous recipients include Richievilla for claiming to be a barrister and then caught seeking legal advice on a scrounging forum, plus, Old Hippy Guy whose made up life stories always seem to correspond to current political events.

However, there’s a new name on the Walter Mitty trophy this year and that is…..(drumroll) WINDY/FLETCH!!!

Congratulations to Fletch/Windy who claimed his flounce from BF was actually a holiday during which he discovered he had a daughter and bought her a car. Despite touring the length and breadth of Britain, Fletch, the compulsive poster, was unable to find an internet connection to feed his habit.

Sadly, Fletch is unable to accept his award as he’s again currently travelling the length and breadth of Britain without finding a way to hook up to the web. He’s no doubt discovered another daughter as well.

Next time,  GibsonSadGit, The Towel Man, Koantemplation, Celt1987 or Old Hippy Scrounger? Who is Welfare Cry Baby of the year?

This should be a shoe-in for suicide-watch Gibson but Old Hippy Scrounger’s Bedroom Tax bleatings might run SadGit close.

Votes please.

Four! or should that be six?

MartyTGFLogoTypePrintSm_1Six was the only handicap of DLA scrounger Alan Bannister. This was his golf handicap despite him claiming he could barely lift his hands above his head and struggled to walk 50 yards. Like so many DLA claimants our mobility car user exaggerated his condition to claim £26k in handouts. As is the way with these types he claimed his condition was fluctuating, meaning he was well enough to regularly play golf but not fit enough for work.

Yet more evidence that the DLA self-assessment form is wholly inadequate and is virtually a free pass for anyone parasite wants to avoid work.

Drinkers/Druggies Living Allowance

Getting tough on spongers
Getting tough on spongers. £12bn more welfare cuts to come. Well done IDS!

It would appear the D in DLA nowadays stands for drinkers and druggies who are boozing and injecting their way through a mind boggling half a billion pounds a year in sickness benefits.  More than 75,000 are using over – generous sickness benefit payments to fund their debauched lifestyle.

46,810 received the payment mainly because of their alcohol misuse and a further 28,440 had a ‘primary disabling condition’ of drug addiction. The alcoholics received £249.8million in ESA and the drug addicts £156.7 million.

On top of this, substance abusers still getting the old Incapacity Benefit last year received £26.3million, and a further £2.2million went on Disability Living Allowance.

 These parasites also receive housing benefit and council tax rebates just to make sure they’ve enough cash to get pissed and high.

I bet this guy posts on Digital Spy:

 One man who lay in bed drinking 12 cans of lager a day won the right to be paid sickness benefit even though health experts said he was simply lazy.

The comments from nurses and health professionals tell us all we need to know about the mentality of many of the almost 2m claiming ESA

A nurse who interviewed the unnamed man said he ‘would drink ten to 12 cans of lager daily’ and had ‘anxiety and depression’ as well as ‘alcohol misuse’ for a decade – but added that his minimal activity ‘appears to be through choice rather than illness’.

What is emerging are two different categories of professional scroungers. Firstly we have the active scrounger who pretends to be ill while spending time at the local gymnasium or golf course and likes to partake in physical, sometimes dangerous sports. These are the exhibitionist types who brazenly appear on television talent shows without any signs of having a “bad back” or on Facebook pages in exotic holiday locations. The second type is your panhandler that leads a sedentary lifestyle, often spending all day boozing or smoking weed and likes to post on internet forums how there aren’t any jobs, even though they’ve no intention of looking for employment.

We can only hope that the crackdown on the many thousands of fraudulent DLA/ESA claimant intensifies and that the trend of  classing fatties, alkies and junkies as disabled is reversed. Then we can start on the “mental health” conditions and fake syndromes many DlA claimants use to subsidise their lifestyle. 

Now it’s been announced the government are looking at withdrawing handouts from druggies,  alkies  and now fatties if they refuse to change their disgusting lifestyles. Naturally, the benefit stealing scum on DS are up in arms.

 Even the previously banned ftsemonks is getting in on the bleating:

All the usual lowlife have slimed onto the thread apart from forum cry baby GibsonSadGit who’ll probably arrive soon and threaten to shoot himself again!  He’ll be shitting himself because he knows the fake mental healthers will be next once this lot of shirkers are dealt with.

Congratulations Sue Marsh

Sickness benefit activist and author of a shitty pro-scrounging blog read by malingerers the length and breadth of the country is suddenly persona non grata with the nations professional sick and “disabled.” With breathtaking hypocrisy Sue Marsh has gone all White Dee and become capable of work once a nice juicy financial inducement was waved under her nose. What makes this hugely amusing is that this wad of cash, all £75K a year, comes from her new employer, Maximus, the direct replacement for Atos a and who’ll be carrying out the new sickness benefit assessments! What a huge kick in the teeth for all those scroungers who read her blog religiously and held her up a some sort of heroine, battling the evil Tory welfare reforms. IDS is loving it and has welcomed her into the fold and it’s further proof that the only two thirds of those claiming ESA/DLA would make an equally miraculous recovery if they were offered the same.